You heard me.

As we all know, as awesome as Paris Hilton is (don't bother trying to argue this with me - Amber Sweet fangirl, remember?), she's still a slut with biggish boobs. Slut comes naturally to me (^_______^), but breasts? BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!! *cough*

So on Wednesday, while I was at home recouperating from my damn sinus infection (O_o), I did my random browsing, as I do, when I'm on the interwebs. I stumbled upon this site [link] (not work/school/family safe), because I wanted to read an article they wrote about rape eroge being banned in Japan (O_O!). I clicked through random links while there, and found this clip [link]. Basically, a transvestite/drag queen (not sure exactly) managed to pull off BIGGER BREASTS than me. Yes, I know it's not that hard, but WATCH THE DAMN CLIP - he started with EVEN LESS THAN ME!!!!!

Anyway, I watched the clip, and thought, "Hmm, he's onto something here." So, when I left from Dad's for the shoebox, I stopped off to my nearest Big W and picked myself up one of the silicon strapless bras. Also went op-shopping and found a plain black pleather skirt that was perfect - I just need to take it up, decide if I want to put splits in the side and I'm done for the skirt (it also gives me some extra material, so I can skimp out on the undershirt by combining fabrics )!

But back to my breast dilemma. It's now Thursday night, and I'm procrastinating on my Music History essay that I handed in today (yay 5pm deadlines!). I've run out of steam, and I'm looking for something to do. I then remember that I bought the bra, and that I have a black bra in mind for Amber. So I start playing around with my bras in front of my mirror, trying to find a solution.

After about 20 minutes of silicon bra placement... EUREKA! Cleavage! ^__________^

That's one part down. But my next problem: lift. Mushing by boobies together like that gives them crazy-ridiculous shape that just fails. So I grab my black bra, put that on over the top, then start messing with placement. New, unexpected problem: although my silicon bra is skintone, it's still obvious underneath my bra, because the cups don't match the shape of the bra.

Fucking grr.

So I start looking for straps to put on with my black bra to experiment with lift. I go diving into my bra drawer, and there it is.. My lace black push-up bra. Another thought occurs, that it may help with my predicament. A little adjusting, and it practically covers the silicon bra, provided I don't move! So my answer to my bra and breast predicaments will be thus (in order of dressing):
*Silicon bra
*Sequined push-up bra (which will now be the de-laced push-up bra in this experiment, simply because I don't want to buy another bra - I *hate* bra shopping)
* Both will be stuck to each other using Hollywood tape, so I don't show at any point

So yeah.. Because I'm awesome.

(Just for the record, today, in between my OHSW test and jam session for Forum, I did nothing but excessive reading on Tin Pan Alley, and crazy-fast essay writing, just like the old days ^__^ Absolute last minute work provides me with crazy-good ideas, AND it's not like I don't still score fairly decently with only one or two drafts of my work.. B grade average for last minute work at TAFE, and my Assignment Writing summary scored 86 - that was practically written three hours before I had to hand it in, AND my Cleo magazine was referenced in the bibliography )